Wednesday, December 17, 2014

Testimony

Being a Christian that knows a great deal about science is a rather lonely place to be. You hear an idea that someone suggests is incredible PROOF that God exists or that God created the universe and you know it is essentially malarkey. Or you realize that some scientific endeavor will come along and put the debate to bed. You hold your tongue because you realize that "proving" God can be a pathway toward strengthening faith, but you feel isolated as they celebrate the revelation and you just sit and smile. You know that faith is not about proving that God exists. It is about realizing that you've been shown a better way, a way that is itself miraculous, a way that itself proves to you that there is a loving God.
Eventually the proof is disproved and ultimately falls into the pile of failed armchair apologetics that decorates the floor of so many modernist churches.
I believed the malarkey when I was a younger Christian. Then I had it pulled away from me slowly and painfully as I learned more about the universe. I hung on to it as hard as I could, because without it I was not a Christian. But the moment it was completely pulled away, it revealed something that cannot be pulled away, the better way, the way of Messiah. It is faith not belief. It cannot be pulled away as easily as simple assent. It is an anchor. God said to me then in my time of complete doubt the words that will never leave me. "Belief is an act of the mind, but hope is a cry of the heart. As long as you have hope it is enough."
Doubt no longer scares me. I always follow it through. Because I have faith that my sustainer will be there at the end. So far he has.
"Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see." ~ Hebrews 11:1

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